Hi there. I’m Kate and I’m writing the blog entry today. Most of the others have tsken turns from time to time but since today we couldnt decide who was going to get to make the post Ive put all the others in time-out and am just doing this myself. I’m the friendly peacemaker who likes to get along. I’m gregarious and nonconfrontational, except where the others are concerned. I keep them in line, or at least try to.
Katherine is the serious one. She writes about her relationship with God and analyses books, movies, tv shows…pretty much anything. She wanted to do a post about how people’s reactions to Rob Bell’s alleged universalism says more about them than it does about God or Bell.
Kathy wouldn’t let her write that post. Kathy is always concerned with what her parents and siblings think. She wants everyone to be proud of her, not angry and certainly not not-speaking-to us. Kathy wanted to write a post about her parents’ dog.
Coble was having none of it. Coble is the streetwise, battle-scarred libertarian who has made it through confrontations with Senators, Congresspeople and various former Vice Presidents during her time as a political aficionado. Coble has almost brought us to the brink of ruin once or twice by speaking her mind. She was going to try it again today by writing something about Tennessee’s Don’t Say Gay bill. Of course you can probably guess why Kathy stopped her.
There was going to be no post at all, then. We were just going to fight amongst ourself and let people mistakenly think we were making fun of the Bed Intruder guy, even though we genuinely like him. But then I reminded us about our sortofvow to keep blogging. Katherine piped up, pointing out that as a Mennonite we don’t swear or vow except in marriage. She reminded us that ecery time Coble has gotten us in hot water with the law we’ve had to affirm out testimony as opposed to solemnly swearing. Kathy then said that, to be fair, Coble has never gotten us in any legal trouble by doing wrong–only by doing right. Ad it’s not like we were arrested or anything. We just keep having to testify at hearings. To which Coble snapped bakc at Katherine that it was HER FREAKING EIDETIC MEMORY that kept putting us in theplace where we had something to testify about to begin with. Then Kathy started whimpering and saying “don’t say ‘freaking’, it’s a fake swear like gosh and crap and fart and mom and dad will be mad.” Katherine started in on the difference between cultural discomfort words and actual swearing and why she was okay with one and not the other. Coble just kept shouting “Freaking frakking crapweiler” at Kathy and it degenerated further from there.
So I am here to fulfill our daily obligation and STILL have no idea what to write about.
I have always suspected this was the case.
Hou could you not?!? You, of all people! ;-p
Sounds like a universal take on the issue…
Did Patrick just make a Rob Bell joke?!? patrick wins!
There are ways of silencing the voices . . . not that you would want to, of course. But if you want to get in touch with just one of them, I’ve found that earplugs firmly in ears w/ the right music and 2 glasses of wine usually does the trick. Or maybe I’m just deluding myself.
Would that it were so easy! But Kathy doesnt drink, Katherine has a million reasons for why headphone use is bad for your health and Coble has very reactionary taste in music.
I have always been sorry that my name is so un-nicknameable. Because I always have to be nm no matter who I’m feeling.
You could go with nm, pm, and smm…
snork. No, actually, a full snicker for that one.
This is one of my favorite posts you’ve ever written. 🙂
So clearly you prefer the Madness to the Method… 🙂
Ditto what jasony said.
Thanks, Linda.
I don’t know how I feel about this post. Hmmm.
Ivy, didnt mean to offend. 😦
Nah, man, I’m not offended. I answered this more fully on Facebook, but I wanted the world to know I wasn’t offended, either. 😀