Blogger Aaron Conrad writes about the morning-after pill, recently approved for girls 15 and up.
Taylor Swift once wrote a heart breaking song about the awkward age of fifteen. Interestingly enough, it included lyrics that told the story of her best friend giving “everything she had to a boy that changed his mind…and we both cried.” Am I naive? Is fifteen that risque now? Is it just lyrics in a song or is this happening at an alarming rate?
You _are_ naive. Incredibly so.
Fifteen is how old girls are when they’ve heard and seen little else beyond the sexualisation of girls and women. Look at some of the clothes in “normal family stores” like Target that are designed for girls as young as four.
Fifteen is the age when you feel like no one loves you and no one will ever love you because you look awkward and feel even more awkward. And society–even the “good shows” like High School Musical and the wretched things on the Disney channel–is all about the message that prettiness is what it takes to be loved. There aren’t really many girls who feel pretty at 15.
And so they have sex, a lot of times just to hear someone say–no matter how fleeting the moment–that they are loved. Or just to imagine that they are loved because otherwise why would the boy want to do these things? Even if you don’t have sex at 15 you consider it. Because after being laughed at for having the wrong clothes or hair or living in the wrong part of town there is a part of you that knows you have this very valuable currency and in the darkest of your nights you consider using it to buy something that may feel for a few seconds like someone actually cares.
That’s what 15 is like for a girl. That’s what it will be like for your girls, no matter how much you love them.
Now imagine 15 for a girl whose father is in jail, whose mother works three jobs to keep food on the table and bus passes in everyone’s pocket. That girl whose family can’t afford cable, can’t get to the library. What is she going to do for fun? Sex is free (for the moment) entertainment where you get to feel a little love in the process.
I’ve seen girls as young as 11 have sex for all of these reasons. Boredom, insecurity, fear, societal pressure. That’s what it’s like for young girls.
And no, I don’t approve of this pill. It’s just making it easier for us to not talk to girls about these things.
But you’re naive if you think 15 is a time of innocence and carefree living.