A few weeks ago I was visiting with a friend who was very troubled about something her child had done. In reviewing the situation the child–actually a young woman at this point–did exactly what her mother had done two decades ago. It was the exact same life choice the parent had made, and which the parent still professes to be happy with.
Given the degree of upsetness, though, it seems that maybe there was some living-through-the-kid going on in the deep recesses.
I’ve been around a great lot of people who live through their children academically, athletically, socially. I almost wonder if it’s unavoidable when you become a parent. I don’t really know that many parents who don’t–in some way or another–view their children’s accomplishments as their own and their children’s failures as a reflection of their flaws.
I think I’m glad, personally, that i’m not in the position of waiting to see how my offspring turns out.