I can’t write anything. So I’m taking this time that i’m supposed to be writing and just typing some things out of my brain that are troubling me.
I rarely if ever end my blog posts with questions; it’s a pet peeve of mine to feel like not only did I read your work but now I have to take an exam about it. Anyway, I have too many pet peeves so whatever. I have a whole peeve zoo. A Peeve Kingdom. A Peeve Sanctuary.
So acknowledging my hypocrisy I’m just writing nothing but a bunch of existential questions. You can answer or not. We libertarians role that way.
1. Speaking of Libertarians, why does everyone think Ron Paul is Teh Crazy yet seem to have no problems with Mitt Romney and his belief that angels gave golden scriptures and magic hats to some conman in upstate New York as a way to start off a new religion where all men are gods and their wives are their Heaven Insurance Pets? Sounds like the crazy is going around if you ask me.
2. Also, why do people think Ron Paul is a Libertarian?
3. Why is Benedict Cumberbatch a sex symbol? I mean, I’d use him on a poster for the Library to get people to read more, because he’s intriguing and charismatic. But sexy? When I think sexy I think someone who doesn’t look quite so much like Lord Voldemort.
4. Why do I have a mini-meltdown whenever I don’t have something to read that matches my mood just exactly?
5. Why does the Ice Cream Man have to be so vaguely threatening? When I was a child with no money he just seemed like an unattainable dream. Now I feel like a conspirator if I go out to buy a bomb pop. “Here. Add this to your Child Abuduction Fund.”
6. I think my backyard is haunted by a man in a duster. Specifically, I think my backyard is haunted by Withnail. Is that weird? I keep seeing Withnail out of the corner of my eye when I’m at my desk working. Like he’s trying to get in the backdoor. Of the house.
8. The writers knew before this season of Eureka that they were being cancelled. So why are they wasting their precious last few hours on dreck? Honestly, why?
9. Mel Gibson, Harrison Ford, Rudy Huxtable…what happened?
10. When will the world shut up about bacon?? I mean, honestly. It’s an okay food. But everyone is acting like bacon is the Great In-Joke. It’s not THAT fabulous. In fact, it’s rather disgusting when you think about it. I’m so just going to go around saying “I just don’t dig on swine, that’s all.”