So there’s this giant pool of quicksand filled with alligators. (No, I don’t know why the alligators don’t sink. They’re magic, I guess. Whatever. It’s a made-up story. You can play along for a few minutes.) Everybody who walks down the trail is going to run into this pool of magical alligator quicksand. You can’t walk around it.
However, there IS a vine handy. It’s hanging right there above the MAQ. If you want to get over, all you have to do is grab the vine and it’ll swing you to safety if you hold on.
There are four types of Christian in the world.
The Pit People
These are the folks who think it’s really important that everyone know about the pit. They stand a few yards ahead of the pit and helpfully say “you know, there’s a pit up there.” They focus a lot of energy on the pit, trying to figure out how many alligators are in it, how deep it is and if it is mostly quicksand or mostly alligators. Sometimes they want to know if there are cobras in there UNDER the alligators. The scarier the pit the better. After all, people will watch their step if they know there’s a pit up there, right?
The Vine People
These people are really jazzed about the vine. They LOVE the vine. After all, it is an AWESOME vine. You grab it and just go swinging! Swinging is fun! So they like to stand a few yards ahead of the vine and tell everyone about this really cool neato vine that makes the trip through the jungle Easier! and Way More Fun! They like to pretend the pit isn’t even there and that the vine is just for swingin’ and getting through the jungle in a cooler, niftier way.
The Tour Guide People
These are the people who stand a few yards ahead of the whole setup. They’ll warn oncoming travellers about the pit, then they’ll let them know that the pit is not too hard to be conquered if you just grab the vine, like the instruction manual says.
The High Score People
They make it across the pit and sit in a group together talking about how great it was to swing over the pit and aren’t they glad they did! They know the pit’s still back there but they don’t like to talk about it. Or think about it.
At different points I’ve been one type of Christian or another. But I’ll be honest. I am not a Pit Person. I don’t like the whole idea of being a Pit Person, even though I know it’s one of the more popular takes on the issue. The past couple of years I’ve toyed with being a Vine Person because that seems like a happier way to go through life. But honestly, there IS a pit there. And it makes the vine more special when you acknowledge that it’s not just a swinging good time but a deliverance from the pit. So I think I’ll settle on being a Tour Guide Person, because I do not have it in me to be a high scorer.