I have to give everything in my life nicknames. If I really love you chances are you have at least 3. The ones who live with me usually have an even dozen–for starters.
To that end I’ve collected the few nicknames our new Gob has gotten. Some are good. Others not so good. You just kinda have to be here….
(*Keep in mind his name is pronouced Zhob like the book of the Bible, not Gawb like a ball of snot.)
TMG or Tiny Man Gob
Goberlin College (yes, this is the stupidest one. But I find myself calling him that a LOT)
This one has most of a whole poem to go with it. I started using this after watching Alice In Wonderland 3 times in a row last Sunday while being stoned out of my mind on Percocet. Words cannot describe how mad I was at that movie for calling the monster the Jabberwocky. It’s as annoying as all those people who call Mary Shelley’s ressurected creature “Frankenstein” instead of “Frankenstein’s monster”. I’m trying to compose a well-worded message to Tim Burton et. al.
“Dear overpraised and overhyped coffee-house hipster wannabe with a gay crush on Johnny Depp who isn’t fooling anyone with his marriage to Helena Bonham Carter because she looks just like Depp if he shaves his facial hair and pops his eyes out like he has a thyroid problem,
Just thought you should know that the correct name of the monster is Jabberwock. The Jabberwocky is actually the name of the poem ABOUT the monster. Your movie kinda blew in other ways too. Especially the stupid Futterwacken dance sequence.”
NMB or None More Black
That’s all I can think of at the moment. I’m sure there will be more.