The worst part about most bad things, from death to taxes, is the dread. Sitting around worrying about something makes the bad event appear ten times worse.
So it’s a good thing I’ve had exactly no time to dread today. Yesterday I went to the doctor. He decided to operate. Today. So in a few hours I will go “under the knife” although it’s going to be a laproscopic surgery with lasers, so I don’t know if we say “under the laser” or just all agree to understand that “knife” is figurative.
We had an interesting poker game with my uterus, cervix and ovaries. Call it four-organ stud. He seemed to think I was crazy for wanting to keep all my factory originals. At various points in the conversation he mentioned taking just the uterus, just the left ovary, etc. At various points I almost conceded an ovary. He asked if I still wanted children. While I’m not sure that I do, it’s easier to keep your junk if you say that you do. Apparently “I want children” is a valid reason for hanging onto the parts you were hatched with, while “they’re mine and I like them and want to keep them” is just nonsense. I guess uteri are like uncles who live with you. As long as they pay rent and have some function you can keep them but if all they do is lay around on the couch and drink beer they’re worthless and have to find their own apartment.
So anyway, I told him that I still wanted children. So we’re going to do the laser route, have a peek around the neighbourhood and see what’s up. He and I are both betting that my colon is attached to the abdominal wall.
I used to want to be a doctor when I was a little kid. I still like medical stuff (as long as it isn’t medical SCHOOL….) The night before last I had the realisation that I am a sort of doctor after all. It was a sad realisation but I am the only individual who knows all of my various problems and how they affect one another. More than once I’ve been able to say “you can’t give me that because it’s contraindicated with another treatment I’ve got.”
Having me for a patient must be just soooo special.
I’ve had no time to worry, so I’m not worried. I’m not scared and I’m not in a bad mood.
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Best wishes, and I hope you’re feeling 110%, soon.
-Jeff
Much love and prayers for wisdom for the Dr and your swift healing headed your way!
My best your way. Google’s homepage indicates that today is the anniversary of the laser. At first, I thought you were writing about that.
Can you ask for “frikkin’ lasers”? I can imagine a whole series of jokes and comments that could come from that. Also perhaps “Laser Kat”? You’ll have to search YouTube for these lovely Andy Samberg creations since I’m blocked by my corporate overlord.
I’m trying to smile instead of being worried for you. Fingers crossed for you. I also know an extremely good Gynecological surgeon in STL that is the bomb if you need 2nd opinions, consultations or more surgery. She’s educational, detailed and in-tune with women, fibroids and issues. She writes most of the surgical texts.
[...] Katherine well today as she is going under the knife laser. I used to want to be a doctor when I was a little kid. I [...]
I think you’re my medical soulmate.
Lucky you.
G-d speed.
You’re always your own best doctor. They may have gone to med school, but you spend every day with yourself.
Best of luck, hope it all went well.
Erin and I are both thinking of you. Hope all is going (or went) well.
Good luck. I have had two ablations and they were both very helpful with my pain levels.
Just got back in town and catching up, hope everything went well.