Right Now I’m Doing Something I Swore I’d Never Do.

April 9, 2007 by Katherine Coble

I’m connected to the World Wide Web on my neighbour’s network. Specifically, the “F—-t Family Network”. Why? Well, because periodically whenever the “F—-t Family” has their network up, it knocks me offline.

I can SEE my network. My Mac says it’s connected to my network. But I have no actual data transfer. Of course the rational part of me knows that this probably isn’t the “F——t Family”’s fault. Still, I can’t help myself. When I see their network name in my AirPort Menu I lose all rationality. I begin to bleed from my eyeballs in seething rage, to froth at the mouth like a rabid Frankenstein. (The Doctor, not the Monster. The monster was an idiot. The doctor was smart, even if he was crazy insane.)

I’ve been trying to get my email for the last 43 minutes. All I get is the little (!) bang frustration mark in the Get Mail window. This convinced me, of course, that I had an earth-shattering email from my biggest client about our huge project, all just waiting for me on the other side of the wire. All just beyond my reach, thanks to the “F—–t Family” and their stupid Network.

So I figured if I can’t beat ‘em, I’ll join ‘em. Thanks, F—–t Family, for finally enabling me to check my email. Goodness knows I badly needed those 6 Harry Potter For Grown-Ups emails about talking portraits.

Posted in jeannie needs a shooter | 16 Comments

16 Responses to “Right Now I’m Doing Something I Swore I’d Never Do.”

on April 10, 2007 at 7:43 am1 jonathan hickman

Sounds like you need to switch the wireless channel on your router, though that’s just a guess.

And I don’t think it’s a very big deal to use your neighbor’s connection, really.

I’ve never seen someone turn their connection on and off like that, though. Weird.
on April 10, 2007 at 8:10 am2 Hubby

Sorry, dearest, but it turns out that this time it wasn’t the fault of the F–t family’s network. Apparently one of the dogs (any guesses as to which one?) bumped the range expander again and knocked out the connection. I re-set it this morning, so you should be good to go.

On a separate note, how pathetic is it that I didn’t just walk downstairs to your desk and tell you this?

-Hubs
on April 10, 2007 at 8:14 am3 Rob Robinson

It’s pretty pathetic, but it’s funny.
I’ve “borrowed” a connection from time to time, too. I confess.
on April 10, 2007 at 8:15 am4 Katherine Coble

But it was up this morning before you reset the Range Expander that Horny-eyes knocked out.

And the F—–T Family Network was offline.

Coincidence? Hmmm. I think not.

I think my being in the basement has something to do with it, because I think depending on the time of day, etc. that the wireless waves from the F—-T Family Network are more directly accessible to my AirPort card.

Of course, I do not know what I’m talking about, so this could all be my sort of wiggity take on things.
on April 10, 2007 at 8:41 am5 jonathan hickman

Ok, I’m just going to say it. I don’t know if you talk about the F–T family from time to time and I’ve just not noticed it, so I’m not sure if I’m the first to say this or if it’s obvious or what, but …

when I read “F–T Family” I think “Fuck it” family. As in “Fuck it, I’ll just use their connection.”

Just me?
on April 10, 2007 at 8:45 am6 Katherine Coble

I’ve never talked about the F—-T family before. And that’s the funny thing…I abbreviated it that way for humour.

But they do indeed have a last name that begins with F and ends with T. A man with their last name has a statue out on I-65.

I just figured that I should keep them quasi-anonymous AND it was just too funny to NOT abbreviate their name that way….
on April 10, 2007 at 8:56 am7 jonathan hickman

Well, I’m glad I’m not the only one, then.
on April 10, 2007 at 9:09 am8 grandefille

I was reading it as “Fart Family” all this time.
Because I am 7, yes.
on April 10, 2007 at 9:16 am9 bridgett

We had the same problem with “Keehler86.” We changed the wireless channel on our router and all was well.
on April 10, 2007 at 9:43 am10 Exador

It serves you right for using a Mac.

Actually the Monster was far wiser; at least more introspective and philosophical, than the doctor.
on April 10, 2007 at 10:04 am11 dolphin

I’ve signed on to a neighbor’s connection from time to time if my network has been down. I figure, if they are not bothering to encrypt their network and I can access from my property, then they obviously don’t mind me using it.

You might consider getting one of the new Multi-Input, Multi-Output (MIMO) routers. We have one and it’s great. It automatically detects if another signal is interfering with its own and adjusts accordingly, all by itself.
on April 10, 2007 at 10:32 am12 jonathan hickman

Oh, and for the record, I have no problem with other people using my connection. And if I did, as dolphin suggested, I’d encrypt it.
on April 10, 2007 at 10:41 am13 Katherine Coble

I have a personal problem with taking something I don’t pay for.

I rationalised this because I’ve paid for my connection, and their connection was interfering with my connection.

Something about that seems right, something about it seems wrong. But mostly right, thus I just went with it….
on April 10, 2007 at 10:50 am14 jonathan hickman

Well, allow me to rephrase. I don’t mind people occasionally taking my connection. If they’re only using what I pay for, I think they should chip in. In your case, you weren’t trying to save a buck or anything; you were using theirs because you thought they kicked you off yours.

Of course, too, you’re not really “taking” anything. It’s not slowing them down. It’s causing no noticeable effect unless you’re doing something illegal.

I don’t know.
on April 10, 2007 at 10:59 am15 newscoma

I don’t mind people borrowing my wireless as I have, on occasion, borrowed other folks as well.
And I’m with Grandfille, I saw Fart Family as well, chortled and giggled and realized I’m also in second grade.
on April 10, 2007 at 12:25 pm16 Katherine Coble

My mental translation was more along the lines of Jonathan’s. ;-p

Although I say “frak”.

Because I am a huge nerd.